Monday, March 30, 2009
It will be ok
I remember as if it were in slow motion, the car coming at me. It crossed the center lane, I could feel the impact before it hit me. I thought about the pain, you , the kids. Amazingly it didn't hurt, it was quick, like a switch, the light was turned off.
I then remember, watching as the paramedics and firemen cut the car, watching from above. Police officers circling, writing down the license plate. I wanted to tell them what happened, but I couldn't, just like I want to tell you, but I can't. Looking down I watched, it took them awhile, finally one of them said it was too late, I was already gone.
All the times I wanted to hold you and I didn't, I want those times back. I want every precious moment with you, its too late. Maybe I should have made better choices, turned the car out of the way. If maybe I accelerated, I could have avoided being struck. All I know is that I was struck and killed. Leaving you with emptiness, leaving you alone, leaving you with children.
It will be OK, you are strong, you are good, you are amazingly beautiful and life will go on. Just remember I loved you, with all my heart.